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Saturday, July 28, 2012

I'M SORRY DON'T PAY THE BILLS


image courtesy photobucket.com

The quotes soon following are a mishmash of thoughts concerning "Sorry" a word that is used to erase an action that others find objectionable, an attempt to restore your credibility with a person or the masses.

Trying to repair a relationship is next to impossible unless the hurt can be expunged.  Being (not just saying) Sorry with corresponding actions is the only tool you have for accomplishing this. The memory will remain until Alzheimer's sets in and even then it will surface occasionally.

People who bank on saying I'm sorry to correct negative reaction to bad conduct are a sorry lot in themselves.

This especially applies to Christians who outright sin and plan in advance to ask for forgiveness for what they want to enjoy. This taxes GOD'S grace to the limit and a word of caution; don't presume on GOD'S forbearance.


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I thought you might enjoy these quotes.

All successful people these days seem to be neurotic. Perhaps we should stop being sorry for them and start being sorry for me - for being so confounded normal. Deborah Kerr

 Being sorry is the highest act of selfishness, seeing value only after discarding it Douglas Horton

Being Politically Correct means always having to say you're sorry. Charles Osgood

Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition, is not only a waste of energy but the worst habit you could possibly have. Dale Carnegie

Girls blush, sometimes, because they are alive, half wishing they were dead to save the shame. The sudden blush devours them, neck and brow; They have drawn too near the fire of life, like gnats, and flare up bodily, wings and all. What then? Who's sorry for a gnat or girl?  Elizabeth Barrett Browning

How does one know if she has forgiven? You tend to feel sorrow over the circumstance instead of rage, you tend to feel sorry for the person rather than angry with him. You tend to have nothing left to say about it all. Clarissa Pinkola Estes

I am immensely contrite. And I'm sorry for the damage I've done. Jayson Blair

I am sorry for what has happened and I know that I need some help. Susan Smith

I am sorry to think that you do not get a man's most effective criticism until you provoke him. Severe truth is expressed with some bitterness. Henry David Thoreau

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Will Saying 'I'm Sorry' Save a Relationship?

By: Todd Pheifer

Without oversimplifying the complexities of various types of relationships, it is fair to say that most connections are built on a particular level of trust and understanding. People make honest mistakes every day. However, in particular relationships there is a general assumption that individuals will not make certain decisions. That may also include an expectation that people will not put themselves into situations where they would be at risk of violating the understood rules and dynamics of the relationship. Therefore, can saying "I'm sorry" save a relationship? Or are there times where it doesn't matter what is said?

Sincerity

When an apology is made, it obviously helps for it to be genuinely sincere. Sometimes an individual will apologize, but the delivery may lack a level of conviction. In addition, there are times when the person making the mistake isn't actually sorry for the offense. Instead, they are simply upset that they got caught, but they feel obligated to make an attempt to apologize. If the violated individual suspects that the apology is not real, the words may not save the relationship.

The reasoning

Another issue with relational difficulties has to do with reasoning. When a breach of trust occurs, there may be a question of intent. In other words, the offended party might inquire as to what the person was thinking when they committed the act in question. If the person doesn't know, or there is a sense that they knew what they were doing, this may cause concern that it could happen again. Sometimes genuine mistakes are made, and particular situations may have a reasonable explanation. However, if it is perceived that a bad situation could have been avoided with relative ease, forgiveness may be difficult.

The type of activity

Whether a relationship can be saved often has to do with the activity itself. For example, in a dating or marital relationship, cheating is a major issue. There are certainly couples that have reconciled after one person cheated on the other, but for some individuals that particular type of activity cannot be forgiven. This is often true for those people who state this expectation in advance. If a partner tells their spouse or significant other that they will leave if cheating occurs, they may feel compelled to fulfill their promise. Again, the issue of trust is key in many types of relationships, and if a person feels like they cannot trust a person anymore, that may cause the connection to erode.

A pattern of behavior

Life is full of second chances, and relationships are no different. A mistake or error in judgment can be forgiven, and while it may change the dynamics of the trust, the relationship may survive. If certain types of behavior turn into a pattern, there may come a point where "I'm sorry" starts to feel very hollow. Forgiveness is often based on the assumption that something has been learned and that behavior will be different in the future. However, a lifestyle pattern may signal that actions are not matching words. In that case, one more verbal apology may not be enough.

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