DARRELL'S WOES Chapter 13

 

Chemistry Lab
Courtesy Stock clip art Google Search

 

Three weeks after Kaylee's passing I decided to return to work, for the solitude that I at first desired had become somewhat oppressive, and I needed to occupy my mind with something other than my loss.

Catching up with the research that was going on was the most important thing for me to do.  Research can change quickly, and I spent much of my time experimenting for new product development.

At night, when alone, I was still haunted by all that I had lost.

Finally I submitted to some counseling which gave me some new avenues of thinking, but what I really needed was an emotional lift.

Three years passed ever so slowly and my girls were growing up and were just short of teenage womanhood.  I was so thankful for their aunt who could deal with issues that accompany the early teens.  Truly I would have been so inadequate for that task.  Biology I knew, anatomy I knew, but the emotional psyche of a teen age girl was beyond my abilities.

My girls felt more grown up than they were, for when we were together they would try to boss me around.  It was “Get a haircut Dad, get some new clothes, get someone to clean this house and you are not eating right.” 

At least we were close and had a good relationship. I never tried to interfere with the way they were being raised for their aunt was a gentle taskmaster and they love her and obeyed her with very little argument.

Bossing Dad
courtesy Google search

At times when they were over I must have seemed lonely and all three of them would ask me if I was dating or had a girlfriend.  They seemed to thrive on giving me a bad time about not going out with anyone. 

 

It was, “Dad you are still young, you need some female company; mom would want you to get remarried.”  

 

I would just shrug it off and laughingly say, “I don't need any more females telling me what to do.”

The fact was I just wasn't interested in anyone that I met. There were several divorcees I knew that were available but they were not for me.  

Here I was just about forty and there had been two women that I had loved passionately, and at times I wondered if it was possible there could ever be a third.

My conclusion always was "I don't think so." My life was finally coming together and I didn't need any new complications.

To be concluded