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Friday, December 9, 2011


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What a mouthful, to love a woman truly, a man must not be emotionally promiscuous.

His affectionate eye must be single and not roving in all directions. If he says he loves, and still has a wandering eye - - he has yet to commit to the one he says he loves. It is possible to be married and never truly love your wife because to do so he must love on three levels.

Eros, the romantic, lustful, desiring kind of love is most important in a marriage. It links them together in moments of ecstasy that transcends any other of life’s experiences. Some never reach this plain spiritually for they cannot contain their desire for other persons; seemingly satisfaction is always out of their reach for their life is a life of un-fulfillment.

Such a one’s love life is much like the missing finale of Franz Schubert's "Unfinished" Symphony. Surely there is something there but it remains incomplete. Solomon was something like that because he never reached the point where he truly loved a woman. He could write sweet sayings to them but they were just sweet lies while thinking of and moving on to the next one.

The Christian marriage is a three party arraignment, the third party being GOD. Covenant vows are made to each other and to GOD and should never be broken.

Mark.10:6-9 At the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”

This is more than divorce for it includes unfaithfulness. The one flesh relationship in Genesis 2 is beyond the scope of this writing but the statement found in “Genesis 2:25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed,” speaks of an openness where nothing is hidden.

Things that have to be hidden are like stated in Solomon 2:15 Catch all the foxes, those little foxes, before they ruin the vineyard of love, for the grapevines are blossoming!

Those little things can turn a marriage sour and bitterness sets in. Once true love is found it must be guarded and nurtured. It takes a two party effort.

Phileo love is affection, tenderness and friendship. This is a must for a happy union. It is in the realm of “Do no harm” where trust is a given and ever present.

Agape love is the love that comes from the reborn spirit toward all mankind especially one’s wife, kids and family, for they are not always easy to love.

I suppose I have laid out what could be called the ideal and perhaps we may fall below this level. Sometime there are false starts, sometimes people just play house but never stop striving for GOD’S plan for marriage.

This post is shared at “Tell Me a True Story.”

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