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Monday, February 24, 2014


So Sad
After yesterday’s news I was still shook up and was trying to regain my equilibrium. Laney came by and picked me up even though it was out of her way.

She said, “We have tests coming up and we better study for them.”

I said, “I had almost forgotten about that.

“After that it won’t be long before the finals and then we get a break. I can use it”

I said, “This hasn’t been an easy year.”

She asked, “What are you going to do this summer?”

I replied, “I will work a regular shift full time and try to save enough so I won’t have to sweat it next year.  My tuition is paid for, but books and other expenses are always looming before me.  I hope to get by with working twenty hours a week when school starts again.”

She said, “I will get my schedule and books early for next semester so I can get a head start on my reading.  If you like I will do the same for you it will keep you from thinking about Sally while she is here this summer.”

I said, “I saw Sally’s mother and she said they were going to be vacationing in the keys this summer so Sally won’t be here at all.”

Facetiously she said, “That being the case we will have to find something else to be upset about.”

I said, “I’ve began to accept the fact she has a life separate from me and it’s up to me to do likewise.  Since her departure I am beginning to get more interested in you.”

Laney said, “Hey, wait a minute I might have something to say about that.”

I replied, “Don’t tell me you haven’t given it some thought, now be honest.”

She said, “Yes I have thought about it and come to the conclusion it isn’t in the books.”

She went on and said, “I think we need to get onto another subject like getting ready for the test that is coming up.”

“Yeah I guess so, it was just a thought.”

She said, “I’m not interested in being a fill in until she comes to her senses and comes back to you again for I know after she gets her fill of the frat scene she will fall back to old faithful.”

I said, “You really think so?”

“Yep, you can take that to the bank.  An older and wiser and I might add experienced sorority gal will return to her man.”

“Somehow you make it sound dirty,” I said.

She said, “It is what it is.  I only mean after she gets it out of her system and she sees how foolish she was it is inevitable she will return.  She may even go so far as to marry and then come back to you, but it will happen.”

“You don’t know that,” I said.

She said, “Then why do you expect and want it to happen?”

I said, “Let’s change the subject for she was probing into my psyche farther than I wanted her to go, and she was exposing a truth I wanted to stay hidden.”

She somewhat agitated said, “You can come over and phone her anytime you want.  You know just to touch base.  Her mother gave you the phone number where they can be reached this summer didn’t she?”

I had to admit I had asked for it and she gave it to me.

Laney was right I was still hanging on, hoping; just hoping.  I told her, “You’re right about everything.  I’m a mess, please don’t be mad at me, I really need your support now more than ever.”

With a stern look she said, “You poor miserable thing, of course I’m here for you.”

For the next half hour we didn’t speak, just trying to concentrate on studying for our exams that were coming up and then she said, “Let’s get something to eat, how does pizza sound?”

“Sounds good to me,” I answered.

Afterward when I got home and no one was around I had to admit Laney was the smartest gal I had ever met.  She could read people and could cut through the façade most phonies project.  I was just realizing how lucky I was having her as a friend.  

I could envision how having a life with her would be just matter of fact while with Sally it would be exciting and full of passion.

Then I thought about how the passion in most of the people’s lives seems to ebb as soon as children come along and the responsibilities start to mount up.

I think Laney has disqualified herself as a potential mate for me so that is a non-issue.

The day of the exam came and we both passed with high scores.  I had to study very hard and Laney just didn’t take a chance of getting less than an A so she was with me all the way.  There were essays to write and one more test till the end of semester.  I would be glad to get this first year behind me.

A study group invited the two of us to join them and prep for the final exam for one of our classes which was to be an oral exam.  It would be the last week of the semester so everyone was a little nervous.

A couple of former students were invited to tell us what happened to them when they took it.  

Somewhat disconcerting they said, “Nothing we could do would prepare us for what was to come.  Just know your subject, read your notes, and get a good nights rest before you take it.  
You won’t know when your turn will be. They will come to the class and call your name and away you will go.  There will be several being tested at the same time by people you don’t know but people that thoroughly know the subject as well or better than your professor.”

The days passed and we studied.  Then one day out of the blue a person came in and called six names and said follow me.  Laney and I were in the first group.  

Three hours later it was over.  The last thing we were told was not to discuss anything with the other students.  If we did we would get a failing grade for the whole year. You are further warned that we have ways to find out if you did.  You have been warned, so don’t make a mistake.

I don’t know about the rest of the class but that scared me and I didn’t even talk to Laney about it nor did she talk to me.  

I heard one of the students didn’t heed the warning and he was invited to take the class over next semester if he cared to.

Since the oral test was the last exam when we walked out of the testing room we were finished for this year.  Now it was just wait to receive our grades by mail.

As I left the university I wanted to block out the whole year’s stress and rest my brain until it was back to next fall.

To be Continued.

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