THE CLEANEST GIRL I EVER SAW

I was living in Oakland, California, the year was about 1938, and I was playing in a vacant lot where me and my friends hung out. This was better than the school yard, because here we could build a fort to defend ourselves from our imaginary enemies.

The enemies weren't totally our creations, for we went to the movies every Saturday, and watched the serial flicks, where the bad guys were always fighting us good guys. We always included ourselves as one of the good guys, and lived the events on the screen as they were happening.

About the time we would get our fort built, and were ready to repel the enemies, some superior forces (older teen age boys) would come along, and destroy our bulwark. It always left us with an empty feeling of defeat.

Remembering back at the age of four I got busted for playing doctor with my girl friend, who was also four. The teasing I received was without any mercy, I just couldn’t take the resulting teasing I received, because it just went on and on without stopping. It got so bad that I swore off girls for life.

Now it was about four years later, while playing in the dirt with our fort, I looked up and saw the cleanest person I had ever seen in my life. I could hardly believe my eyes; this beautiful girl was standing on the sidewalk, looking in my direction. She was so neatly dressed; her hair was combed, with every blond hair in place. She wore a pretty blouse, nice sweater, and a skirt with bobby sox and dress shoes. Not only was she clean, but she was the whitest person I had ever seen. She didn't look like she had ever been out in the sun. I didn't know what to make of it, of course you must remember I was only eight, and hadn't been around very much.

I'm not sure what happened next, but when I looked at her, and then I took a good look at my self, I thought I better clean up a little, because I wanted to talk to her. I felt that my romantic days might not be over after all.

The first thing I did was to take a quick trip to the store, and buy me some hair oil; brilliantine was my favorite at this time. I soaked my hair in it and combed it, and thought I was looking good, until I noticed I must have put too much on, because it was running down my cheeks. Since I had so much dirt in my hair it had caused dirty streaks to flow down my face. I decided I had played in the dirt too long and would have to wash up, hair and all. After semi-bathing, afterward I reapplied a small amount of hair treatment, and combed my hair. Now I was ready for meeting, and talking to the cleanest girl I ever saw.